He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
the second she challenged me to mario kart drinking game i knew i was in love
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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