5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
Did we literally take a cab across the street
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Randomize