Well apparently he's into motor boating.
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
I'm definitely not at Wal-Mart eating jalapeno poppers with an elevated blood alcohol content
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
