you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
'Twas I. Do you have any idea what it's like waking up to see you sent a text inviting someone to partake in "sexy rumpus?"
I forgot to tell you about my 7:30am Sunday morning run to the local convenience store to buy condoms, a du-rag and a shot glass
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
Randomize
