Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
the reason why you were crawling on your hands and knees from room to room last night was because you thought the ceiling fans were chasing you...
that makes sense.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
