jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
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