she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
You tried to stop drinking but then she started feeding you tequila with a spoon. You were like an adorable baby bird.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
