I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
We're going to brunch on Super Bowl Sunday. I am not a smart man.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
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