You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did we literally take a cab across the street
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
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