did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
He just told me that when we were doing it I told him I was the captain and he was the boat. Im too embarassed to ask for money for a cab.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Honestly I volunteered because the email made it sound like it was a once in a lifetime opportunity to be a sexual spy kid.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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