She's JV to your varsity
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
wasn't that the evening we made out with the girls from the dental school, drank 3000 beers, almost had to beat up a guy at the strip club and James nailed some hot piece of tail and took her OSU windbreaker, which my dad went on to wear multiple times after finding it in the garage.
Yes. To all of that. Yes.
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
Randomize
