8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
My roommate is downstairs drunk, smoking, and listening to a self help DVD. Please dear God don't let this be the Ghost of Christmas Future.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
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