I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize
