Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Randomize
