Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I don't know what's more sad having a rewards account at a liquor store or already racking up 273 dollar points since january
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Randomize
