YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
i popped this huge zit on her back while she was blowing me. it was like a disgusting metaphor for what happened 30 seconds later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
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