i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
The only people who have said happy valentines day to me today have been 2 homeless people.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
I'm armed with nothing but $4 lip gloss gum and my phone. Ready to take on the fucking world.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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