...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Is a wave an appropriate goodbye when your one night stand wakes up and walks out towards the door while you are looking through the garbage for the evidence of a condom?
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
You ripped the leaves off the top of a pineapple then rubbed the rough skin part all over your face saying "this is how you mate with other species"
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