I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
He came inside and met my grandmother after we had sex in the driveway. I love that he has a van.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
You gonna smoke this blunt? Or are you gonna keep doing Kung-fu in my kitchen?
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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