Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Hey I need you to run the morning meeting, for reasons I can explain when I find out where I left my car
Randomize