Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
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The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
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We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
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