she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
my dad's beating me at drinking again. No matter what i do I can't win.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
You said my dick was impressive. You thank someone when they say that. My momma raised a gentleman.
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
Randomize
