I called you to phone bone last night, but you were out with your boring friends playing video games
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Randomize
