Heybabeimwearingurpanties
morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Randomize
