Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
Watching her eat just hurts me
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Randomize
