There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
