and you said cock pushups were impossible
Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Randomize
