Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Randomize
