the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
I wish they made helmets for livers.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Mustard is by no means a replacement for yellow wall paint
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Randomize
