You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Now i know why people get high. I sat in the same chair for about 3 hours and the only thing i worried about was how far away my chinese food was.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Took me 10 minutes of oral to finally get him hard for like 30 seconds of sex until he came and passed out. Def not worth the ROI.
Funny, 'cause his story is it went great. He faked passing out so he wouldn't have to do anything in return.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
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