all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
If I had your ass I would rule the world
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