we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I guess I look like the kind of girl who would buy edible, weed-infused lube.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
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