dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
My brother just woke up to see me on te couch dipping hamburger buns into pizza sauce. I'm beginning to question the life choices that led to this moment.
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
Randomize
