Duck Duck Cougar?
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
where are you?
sonic
Good. I hungoveredly cleaned your room. This is what being married is going to be like. I pick the condoms up off the floor and you bring home the hot dogs.
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
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