Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
Our sex from this weekend should be engraved into a plaque or commemorated somehow. It was fucking amazing.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
