it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
i just renamed my vag "the sorting hat"
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Last night: Repeatedly yelled about how the fishbowl tasted like blue, stole a stranger's hat, hugged the DJ for playing my request, made out with my roommate, and abandoned the guy I dragged to the club in the first place
This morning: Hat doesn't fit, hangover headache is blue, and I can't move without getting lightheaded
Listen when they tell you not to drink after giving blood
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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