why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Do you remember vividly describing the shape and girth of my cock to that girl last night?
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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