I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Dude, I totally just made my launch phrase on my new phone "Wingardium Leviosa" so that when people try it and it doesn't work I can say, "It's leveeOHsa, not leveeoh-SA."
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
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