last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
i will never coherently bang her
He just left me a message saying he left the rest of the weed for me. Did i just get paid for sex? And if yes did i just get paid in drugs?
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
It was just a friend comforting a friend. Except his penis was inside of me.
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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