So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
