he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
