i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
He wasn't excited for the fifty shades of grey trailer, so I told him we're done
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
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