Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
instead of telling him i dont hook up with closet frat guys, i gave him his "straight' fraternity brothers number... pike house will be interesting tonight
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
