If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
He was gone for 5 minutes, opened the car door and said, "Don't eat my shit." and dropped Chipotle on the passenger seat. He was gone for another 10 minutes and came back with Coldstone. That stoned.
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