That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
I have successfully trained your dog to bring me pudding cups!
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
Randomize
