I'm going to rape someone's good day.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
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