I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
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