what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Randomize
