Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
theyre just this beautiful family of functioning alcoholics. i want them to adopt me.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
Randomize
