Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
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